Happy and Sad

Mixed feelings, The order of the day. I don’t know exactly why I’m feeling this way but I am okay. I know inside I will be fine soon. Maybe some more sunlight would be helpful and maybe if I wasn’t in this confusing situation with the law and maybe if I hadn’t busted my hand, so yeh that means no dancing for a while (for those who came in late… I breakdance so I use my hands ALOT). Its also quite hard to draw and paint. lucky I can still think and type. (Maybe slow but it’s worth it)

Had a bit of trouble in the middle of the night (why is it always at that time?) I guess because that’s when I’m truly exhausted from the day and I can’t take anymore stress that plays on my mind. It’s sometimes very hard to shut down. Woke up again in sweats from the fentanyl wearing off in my sleep. It’s quite a hard medication to keep level. Even with my safe method of usage. I really need to be changed to something else soon. It will happen I know.

Two days ago my dog Bonny had some puppies. That was a charm. The pups are beautiful. There is one a little one different colour and size to the others I guess you could call her the runt but I think little one is a better title for her. The others are all big and strong.  Six pups all up 2 boys 4 girls. I was told that made me a grandma now. Funny because Bonny really looks for help from me sometimes. I just watch them and try and keep them calm and quiet so Bonz get some rest.

So with all this I have a lot of animals to care for and concentrate on.  I think for at least 6 weeks. So it’ll be around my birthday when the pups are running around and chewing everything in sight. Watching my Bonz care for them brings such happiness. How can anyone be sad with all these little hearts needing some love. I’ll be fine.

Peace,

NW

Love ya all. xo